I Wish I Had the Option of Conning Somebody into Calling Me Out of School...

I have to give a presentation in my research group today. There are roughly 10-12 people in the group, 3 of which are professors. Our group is "studying" a newer area of mathematics called Tropical Geometry (as my Russian professor likes to say, it's "hot"). I use the term studying loosely as understanding anything that goes on in our meetings requires several years of prerequisite courses that neither I nor 4 of the other first year graduate students in there have been exposed to. I guess you could say the purpose of the group is to throw us unexposed people in with the experienced people so we can talk and get a feel for what is going on in mathematics today.

Either way, I am extremely nervous. I do not mind talking in front of people...as long as I know what it is I am talking about (makes sense, right?). As a group we are going through a paper titled "Automorphisms of Free Groups and Outer Space". If you can tell me what those words mean I would be grateful as I have no idea. Ok, correction: I know what the words mean but when putting them together I become lost.

The goal of my presentation is to get an idea of what a specific example of "outer space" looks like. Unfortunately this is not outer space in the sense of astronomy, but in topological space (again, somebody please tell me what that is because I am not entirely sure.)

I planned on putting the finishing touches on my presentation last night, but after taking a test, spending 10 hours at school and returning home to realize that I left my house key in my office, I knew that doing anything other than laying in the tub and putting songs onto my new Ipod (yay I got it finally!) would cause a mini-nervous breakdown. Instead, I decided to go to sleep at 8:30 last night, which I was able to do with ease and without taking any kind of sleeping medication. So, I woke up at 5:30 this morning and I have felt great all day....until about 15 minutes ago when I realized that I have less than 2 hours until my presentation.

Now I want to go home, crawl into bed and hide under the covers...Save me!

Half Empty or Half Full?

Actually it looks to me like it's either 3/4 empty or 1/4 full. I'm swaying towards 1/4 full*. If you are wondering, the answer is: Yes this is the exact wine glass I was looking for this weekend. I spent a decent chunk of my weekend scouring the area for this beautiful, large wine glass and I was without luck. Last night I even went online and searched for places to order from. Unfortunately, and rightly so, not many places deliver cheap wine glasses. Where did I find it and its partner glass (that's right I bought two)? Kroger, the local grocery store! What are the odds that on the day they decided to have a produce sale (big enough to mention in my blog), I happen to venture off into the wine section where they have a gorgeous wine display with these glasses used as fillers? As a mathematician, I naturally calculated said odds and here are the results: pretty high. Seeing as the wine aisle is two aisles before the ice cream aisle, I walk past them every time I go to Kroger, which is at least twice a week (hey a girl has to have something regular in her life). Plus, the glasses have probably been there the entire time that I have been shopping there, and I have never noticed until now. Well back to my school work...

*It doesn't matter. What does is that the bottle is EMPTY! :(

Feeling Low?

Then run from it while listening to Ingrid Michaelson's The Way I Am. Try not to belt it out. Just try. I heart her voice and I think you would too.

One of my guilty pleasures is listening to my Ipod. It's my escape from EVERYONE here. At least I try to make it my escape. My Ipod is several years old so the battery does not hold charge as long as I would like. Oftentimes when I am in my office I will just put the ear buds in even if the battery is dead to give the appearance that I do not want to be bothered. I figured it would be the nice of way of saying "Leave me alone, I don't want to talk to you or anyone else" without having to say it. However, seeing as nearly everyone here is socially awkward they don't read the sign so they just stand next to me until I acknowledge them. Sometimes I make it a game. How long will you stand next to me quietly waiting while I don't look up????

Anyway, I recently gave in and searched for a refurbished Ipod in my price range. Lucky me I found a good deal on an 8 GB Nano that should be delivered this week. The only pitfall is I could only find one in a gaudy sky blue tone. As long as I can actually tune people out with it instead of faking it, I'll be happy.

In other news, my wine obsession has been going strong. I actually do not have my own wine glasses, though. I have been using my roomies', which are plastic (thankfully so...she is clumsy when sober). If I am going to do this, I need the right equipment. What I really want is an unreasonably large wine glass of my own. My guests can use the plastic cups...unless any of you readers comes over to have a glass...in that case, maybe I should get two. I went on a mini hunt for my glass of choice yesterday, but came home with no such luck. Any suggestions?

Oh, Potential New Roommate stopped by Friday afternoon. She is a reporter for a local newspaper. She seemed like somebody I would get along really well with i.e. somebody that I would become friends with regardless of us living together. She seemed to really like the place, area, us, ...however she wants to think about the cost before she makes her decision. Keep your fingers crossed.

Que Shiraz Shiraz

Update: I have a latest mini-obsession. I started buying wine last week and since then I have been drinking a class almost every night.

My parents have become winos over the past few years and after I turned 21 (actually probably before) I would on occasion drink a glass with them during dinner. I was itching for a light buzz a few nights ago and I was not looking forward to the bloaty aftermath of a cold beer so I bought a bottle of wine instead. After scouring the local package store (i.e. southern liquor store; you can use that one with your friends and boggle their minds; it sure as hell boggles mine), I finally found one of my mother's suggested bottles. It's called House Wine. It is a delicious red made from a mixture of grapes. Plus, the label looks like a child wrote the name and then drew a big house in the middle, which just made it that much better.

Now I am sipping on a Shiraz. I couldn't place the taste of a Shiraz when I was at the PACKAGE store so I bought a trial bottle. If you have a suggestion of a wine you like let me know. Oh, and please keep it in a poor student's price range.

In other news, one of the roomies' boyfriends stayed here over the weekend. It just so happens that her bed is directly above mine. Needless to say I am happy that he is leaving in a few minutes as I will not have to fall asleep to the squeak of her bed tonight. I have not talked to her that much while he has been here, but I am not sure how long I can hold in my burning question: What intense non-sex act (she is a virgin; correction, as of Friday that was her status, now I'm not so sure) were they performing to create that much squeak?

Lastly, in my news, Loverboy and I have made the decision to live with each other during my summer break. I am looking for full-time tutoring positions around his apartment. On top of that, I am trying to find a third roommate to fill in for me during the summer and stay after Cat-Obsessed Roommate moves out in August. Know anybody?* If you do, send them to my ad on Craigslist.com (i.e. my second current obsession).

*Perhaps if you got a hold of Georgia Niecy, she would accept the offer.

I Need Advice

What is a good way to say, "Bitch, you drank the rest of my milk and now I am pissed at you?" without turning the situation into a big situation?

Bad News Puts Me in Bad Moods

Yesterday I received my email of rejection from Ohio State University. While reading it, I felt like my lungs were collapsing and at one point. I thought I would have to call a paramedic to remove the enormous elephant sitting on my chest. Instead, I sucked back the puddles of tears that were forming, logged off my computer, left the building and walked to my car. While I driving home, I sat in silence, listing off all the consequences of that dreaded email. As I pulled into the driveway, my shower of tears began. Let's just say, there is no longer a drought in My Neck of the Woods, Georgia.

What could anybody say to me to make me feel better? It's not as if I am being left in a horrible situation. Nothing is changing. I just have to stay here longer. Big deal, right?

That's the point, though. Nothing is changing. My life is going to continue while the distance between me and everyone that I love stays the same. I hate distance. I hate waiting. And, even though I am not in a horrible situation, I hate it.

I told Loverboy last night that we were going to have to wait longer to move in together. All he could say was, "This sucks." I don't know what I wanted him to say, but hearing "This sucks" over and over again wasn't very reassuring. I can't help but think that it is my fault that we are not physically together. But then again, I did everything that I could to get myself there. What did he do?

I feel like him and I are in a little rut. My news definitely did not help dig us out. I am going to visit him in less than 2 weeks. We will be with each other for an entire 2 weeks. I am hoping we can get back to normal by the end of our visit. But then again, what is normal with us? We continuously compare our current relationship to our old relationship when we lived within 10 minutes of each other. We have to move on from that and come to terms with the fact that our relationship is long distance and it will be for longer than our old, close relationship.

On the bright side, at least I found out that I am not moving just in time to renew my lease. Plus, I decided that once the semester is over and I have time to breathe, I am going to adopt a pet. With Loverboy and everyone else so far away, I need something of my own to cuddle besides my pillows.

Remember When Playing Tag Kept You In Shape?

In accordance with Pokey's game of tag, I have listed below five weird/random things about myself and five places I would like to see for the first time or just visit again.

Five Weird/Randoms About Me:

1. When I listen to certain songs on my Ipod, I imagine that I am in a movie and the song is playing in the background as if on the soundtrack.
   
2. Unless I am really focused I usually have at least three thoughts running through my head while the rest of my brain repeats lyrics to some random song.
3. Almost all of my moles are in pairs. I have two on the side of my belly button that make it look like a smiley face. [Sidenote: if Loverboy is upset I can usually get him to crack a smile by flashing him my smiling belly.]
4. I think the holiday Reese's [i.e. Easter Egg Reese's or Christmas Tree Reese's] are sooo much better than the normal peanut butter cups.
5. The smell of licorice gives me nausea.

Five Places I would like to visit:

1. My parents house
2. Loverboy's apartment
   
3. Both of my grandparents' houses
4. The Caribbean, but only if my sister goes with me so we can take on Tortuga again
5. Alaska, but not until I am a little older so I can really appreciate it.

I can't think of anybody that hasn't been tagged on this yet so Megaso and Grandma B tag you're it! Click on my Hits to Happiness/Comments section and leave yours there please.

In other news:

I took cousin Chris's advice and e-mailed Travelocity about my unsatisfaction. About an hour ago, I received an apologetic email from Travelociy, Passport to Fun and Shopping Essentials along with a refund of all of my money. Thanks Chris!